Monday, November 28, 2011

Welcome to Motherhood

Dear new mom,

The first thing you should know is that you are normal. Everything you are feeling is normal. Millions of women have been in your shoes and for some reason just don't ever talk about it.

It is OK to feel happy, elated, sad, weepy, angry, frustrated, exhausted, energetic and all that in a span of 10 minutes.

It is OK to question your choice to have a baby in the first place. Every mom has those moments. The whole "what have I gotten myself into"? feeling is normal. It's a HUGE change. YOU CAN DO THIS.

It is OK to have moments where you don't like that baby. It's true, hard to write and read but so very true. You are learning to take care of, and anticipate all the needs, wants and desires of a whole other person. On top of your own. It's only natural that you have moments of annoyance or anger towards the person who is demanding so much of you. That does not mean you love them less, it just means you are a human learning to do a HUGE task. It is OK to put that baby in the crib, crying or not and walk away until that anger passes. It will get better. It is OK TO TALK ABOUT THIS TO SOMEONE!!!!!

A crying baby will be fine. No baby is allergic to crying.

Please say OUTLOUD the ways that your husband can help you. Do not assume that he will magically read your mind. I bet he really WANTS to help you but he feels as lost as you. A simple kind suggestion to what you need or want done can go a long way to making everyone a little bit happier. Talk about how hard it is to be a parent!

You will feel like a crazy person. You have insane amounts of hormones literally raging through your body. You will literally, simultaneously say something that sounds like a deranged woman is talking WHILE hearing your inner voice yell "WHAT ARE YOU SAYING YOU CRAZY WOMAN?". Take a deep breath, say "I'm sorry" and move on. Don't beat yourself up over it. It will get better.

You will leak milk at the least appropriate times. You will probably expose yourself to a stranger at least once. Don't worry, you WILL get the hang of it. When it's all said and done you may end up with less cleavage than you started with. Sorry, it can be true.

If you are going to breastfeed please try for at least a month. I hear SO many people say "I tried for two weeks and quit"...it gets SO MUCH EASIER after two weeks. It really, really does. Your body needs at least that long to adjust to this strange new thing that you are doing.

Your hair will fall out. Not all of it but a lot of it. All the hair that you didn't shed while pregnant. Pony tails help.

Your bladder will never be the same. Go when you need to, don't wait.

Mylicon is a lifesaver. There are a million uses for plain cloth diapers that don't involve using them as diapers. When trying to decide what you NEED for a baby think about life on the prairie and how little they needed and had then. A bed, some clothes, some bottles/boobs and diapers are all a baby needs. Don't give into pressure to buy it all.

Attending to things other than baby does not equal neglect (like taking a shower or eating or washing a dish). It is also OK to skip all those for a nap. Take a nap when you can. Sleep changes everything. EVERYTHING. If you nurse in bed, do it knowing that you will probably fall asleep...adjust baby accordingly.

Your baby will probably fall off the bed. At least once. You may also drive without having them buckled in the bucket carseat (unintentionally), baby talk to your husband and your once amazing memory will start its exit routine.

You will regularly have in depth conversations about poop. When, where, how much, texture, color...all of it. And it won't feel weird until you do it in front of non-kid having people.

You will be pooped on, puked on, spit-up on and drooled on. Oxiclean will take care of most of it.

Don't ever thank God that the baby is finally asleep.
Somehow that is code for "please make him cry right now!".

Middle of the night bargaining never works.

Never say anything that starts with "My kid will never...".

Most of all, I want you to know that you can do this. God chose YOU to be the mother of HIS sweet precious baby. You were handpicked by the creator of the universe to have your own little disciple to minister to. Admit when you have made a mistake, ask for forgiveness from God and that baby and keep trucking on. You are stronger than you know and before you know it these days will be in the distant past.

Find someone to talk to.

YOU CAN DO THIS!

Love,
Been there and done that.

What do you think moms? Did I leave anything out that you wish you knew when you were first a mom?


{credits to www.littlebitfunky.com/search/label/mom%20stuff}

Monday, May 23, 2011

Get a Job, Sha-na-na-na-na...

Remember that old song?
It was sung by The Silhouettes in 1957, before my time but I'd say everyone has heard it.

Anyway, I read a blog this morning that touched a nerve.
I was thinking about how tired I have gotten of listening to people say they can't find a job ANYWHERE, they can't get a job or find the right job, and yet they need income, and they have expenses, so...

Are you really serious about needing money?
Nothing wrong with fast food - I actually learned a lot working at my first job, which was Karmelkorn in our local mall.
McDonald's may not be your career choice, but please!

So ---
I am turning over my blog post today to republish a post from ScLoHo's Collective Wisdom .com


Everyone has to start somewhere
By Harvey Mackay

Comedian Jim Carrey took a job as a janitor at a tire factory at age 15 when his father lost his job. He also worked as a security guard. To relieve his stress, he visited local comedy clubs, which instilled his love of comedy -- and prepared him for a blockbuster career.

Everyone has to start somewhere. Like Jim Carrey, I started by pushing a broom at an envelope manufacturing company and worked my way into sales in six months. My career path took a different turn, but all in all, I'd say my humble start led to a life I love.

You never know where your career will go once you get your foot in the door and learn about different businesses.

Many famous people started out very small before they hit it big. The main thing is they started and got experience. Pride didn't get in the way -- they had to pay the rent, eat and work toward their ultimate goals. Consider these examples.

Before Brad Pitt was a leading man in the movies, he worked various odd jobs, including driving limos, moving refrigerators and dressing up as a giant chicken to attract customers to a local restaurant.

Another one-time janitor is Stephen King. He job was cleaning a girls' locker room, which later became his inspiration for his best-selling novel "Carrie."

Cooking show hostess Rachael Ray started out working at the candy counter at Macy's in New York City. She later managed the fresh-foods department, which helped pave the way to her sizzling cooking career.

Donald Trump collected soda bottles for the deposit money and later went around with rent collectors to learn about that business. Do you suppose that's where he got the idea for The Apprentice?

David Letterman, Diane Sawyer, Raquel Welch and George Carlin were all weather people on TV.

Michael Dell, founder and CEO of Dell computers, and personal-finance guru Suzie Orman, washed dishes at restaurants.

The late George Steinbrenner, who later owned the New York Yankees among other businesses, helped his older siblings raise the family's chickens, which he would also kill and dress for customers.

Working at ice cream shops is part of the resumes for Julia Roberts, Lucille Ball and Robin Williams, who also was a street mime before he got into acting.

And I'd wager that every one of these fabulously successful people would tell you that they still remember the lessons they learned from those early labors -- even if one of those lessons was that they wanted more out of life.

Few people would describe their first jobs as their dream jobs. The work is usually hard, the pay is never enough, and the hours are lousy. The experience, however, is invaluable.

As college graduates start to learn the realities of the business world, I tell them that they will have to pay their dues. There is no substitute for real-world experience. Hard work is still a requirement for success. You can't start at the top and work your way up.

In this economy, I'm frequently hearing stories about folks who are starting over in their careers due to downsizing, restructuring, technology or belly-up businesses. Most don't have to start at the bottom, but they aren't making lateral moves either.

My advice is always the same whether you are starting up or starting over: Keep your options open. Don't discount the value of any working experience. Expand your network at every opportunity, because you never know who might know someone who could use your talents and skills. Volunteer some time to get more and varied experience. Make sure you have a presence on social networking sites, especially LinkedIn and Facebook.

Perhaps the most important tip I can pass along is this: Never be afraid to ask for help. There are plenty of people who have created successful businesses, and even more who have built successful careers. Learning from others is essential, no matter how much you have learned from your own experience.

Finally, don't be afraid to dream. Long before Mickey Mouse, Walt Disney dropped out of school at age 16 to join the Army, but was rejected because of his age. He became a Red Cross ambulance driver in World War I instead. He wanted to be an artist when he came home, and with determination, an entertainment empire was born. For Walt Disney, "a dream is a wish your heart makes."

Mackay's Moral: You can't win the race if you never start.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Starting New Habits and Saving Money

Well... it seems peer pressure has been in full swing at my church on Hill Road! Almost everyone and their brother are posting on facebook and chatting in the aisles about their running, their fitness training, their P90X workouts, their new Zumba classes... it's hard to be a couch potato these days!

So ~ I've been trying to start new healthier habits. Why oh why is that so difficult?

I'm in my last week of the No Boundaries program (sponsored by our local Fleet Feet store) and it has been a short (sometimes grueling!) time of learning about running and trying to get into shape for a 5K, although I did not start this in order to do a 5K. I have actually walked the Susan G. Komen 5K race each year in Kingsport since Mom's cancer diagnosis. For those of you interested in numbers, it takes me an hour to walk the 3.1 miles.

For me, the program was to be a kick-start to doing regular, weekly activity. I felt like I needed the accountability, someone who would miss me when I missed, and perhaps some helpful information to get me on the right track. I needed a healthy choice that I can maintain in order to combat the osteoporosis that I have since suffering from early menopause at the age 36.

But another phenomenon was going on at my church about the same time all this healthy stuff was happening: the crazy coupon addiction!

Ladies at church talking about the best deals, their great savings, and even posting pictures of their treasures. While I love a good deal and I don't mind using coupons for items that I actually use, I much prefer freebies and giveaways!

I was the dorky kid who always filled out the mail-in forms and sent $1 shipping to the cereal company for whatever cool item was being advertised. I place the blame squarely on my Mamaw Ketron's shoulders because she was forever mailing things out and getting things in. It was like Christmas every day in her mailbox!

That is why I love this site - The Giveaway Scout www.giveawayscout.com/.
It searches the world wide web and looks through blogs to find what the coolest giveaway is! Now isn't that something? Take a peek - and I've added their widget to my blog to make it easy for you.

If we would each take advantage of all our resources, think of what an impact we could make by sharing the surplus with those in our community who are in need. Because one healthy choice can lead to another!

By the way, here's a neat coupon/deal site to help in your quest to save money - Southern Savers www.southernsavers.com/ and here's a fitness teacher that can get your too comfy tushy up and moving - archerfitness.blogspot.com/2011/05/group-fitness-isnt-limited-to-classroom.html - May we all continue or renew our New Year's resolution to get healthy with our money and our bodies as we start the summer season!

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Lies and Truth... Love Conquers All

So, I've been on an emotional roller coaster this week... actually it's been since last Mother's Day... some of you know the details. I'm exhausted right now. And I was driving home from a road trip Saturday when this Toby Mac song came on the radio. I had one of those "ah-ha" moments, realizing that too many decisions in my life have been based on fear; fear and disbelief.

Not really believing that I was loved or good enough. Because of a stupid perfectionist personality, knowing that I was trying my best, and still failing... so therefore I was most assuredly not worthy of love from anyone.

And is this why someone becomes self-destructive? rebellious? wallows in sin? because you wrongly believe you can't do better? or make a change? you're beyond hope?

Sometimes I'm strong, and I can see the schemes of the devil, and I can discern the lies from truth.
And sometimes I'm not.
I have conversations with myself, my weak flesh, and my tormented memories of bad decisions... and then I'm stuck down there in the muck and mud, defeated and depressed.

It's one thing when it's me. It's another thing when it's my child.
And my heart just continues to be broken. I think I've cried it all out. I think I've turned it all over. And then out of no where, I feel the pain and the tears just start to pour out of me again.

How long do we wait Oh Lord? And why do we have to wait?
I become an impatient 2-year-old so quickly in this pain.

And then the quietness of the Holy Spirit comes into my mind, a scripture verse (“Cast your burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain you..." Psalms 55:22) or the words to a Toby Mac song:

You turned away when I looked you in the eye,
And hesitated when I asked if you were alright,
Seems like you're fighting for your life,
But why? oh why?
Wide awake in the middle of your nightmare,
You saw it comin' but it hit you outta no where,
And theres always scars
When you fall that far

We lose our way,
We get back up again
It's never too late to get back up again,
One day you gonna shine again,
You may be knocked down,
But not out forever,

You rolled out at the dawning of the day
Heart racin' as you made you little get away,
It feels like you've been runnin' all your life
But, why? Oh why?

So you've pulled away from the love that wou'd've been there,
You start believin' that your situation's unfair

But there's always scars,
When you fall that far

We lose our way,
We get back up again
Never too late to get back up again,
One day, you gonna shine again,
You may be knocked down but not out forever,

This is love callin', love callin', out to the broken,
This is love callin'.
This is love callin', love callin',
I am so broken
This is love callin' love callin



God, please let me be confident in Your Love and let me rest in You.
Thanks to Toby Mac for the song, and thanks to God for the reminder. <3

Monday, March 14, 2011

Success

Willie II's great -grandfather, Cornelius Vanderbilt, was in the first grade the year George Washington died. Five years later, Cornelius quit school at age eleven and set out to make his mark on the world.

When he was sixteen, Cornelius Vanderbilt borrowed his mother's life savings to buy a little sailboat to haul passengers and freight between Staten Island and New York City. Hungry, focused, and efficient, Vanderbilt quickly dominated the business and broke his competitors. His little boating enterprise became known as the Staten Island Ferry. By the time he was forty, his ships were hauling passengers and freight to ports all along the Atlantic coast, earning him the nickname "Commodore."

Since passengers and freight were the Commodore's business, it was only natural that he would buy up struggling railroads and turn them around. The difference between Vanderbilt and his predecessors was that his trains ran on schedule and the service was excellent. His New York Central Railroad quickly grew to become the nation's largest enterprise. During the Panic of 1873, Vanderbilt gave jobs to thousands by ordering the construction of Grand Central Station in NYC.

Cornelius Vanderbilt offered better service and lower prices than his competitors, but these are not the things that made him wealthy. The characteristics that made him one of the richest men in the world were best described by a friend:

The largest employer of labor in the United States, he despised all routine office work; kept his figures in a vest-pocket book; ate sparingly; never speculated in stocks; never refused to see a caller; rose early; read Pilgrim's Progress every year; and, for diversion, played whist and drove his trotters whenever he could.

Cornelius Vanderbilt did not offer better service and lower prices so that he might become rich. He became rich because he loved hauling passengers and freight, and because he did it very, very well.

Why do you do what you do? Is it for the money alone, or is it because you love to do it well? Wealth is not a destination, not a sparkling city on a hill. Wealth is simply a by-product of passion. You will become truly rich only when you learn to love what it is you do.


"Success is a journey, not a destination." - Ben Sweetland

Thursday, January 06, 2011

My name is Sandy and I'm a Salt Addict

I am adamantly opposed to making New Year's resolutions in January, as I think they are a set up for failure. Why can't we adopt September as our time for a 'new start' - each fall at the beginning of every school year, we would get a clean slate. I always loved that - new composition books, new notebook, new pencils... ah, my love affair with supplies must have started in the fall of my childhood. But that's another topic.

Everywhere you turn in January, someone somewhere is expounding on how to live better. I am all for living better, at least in theory. But when it gets too personal, I feel those strong rebellious urges rising up inside me.

The most recent item to slap me down was this article about SALT in the Jan issue of Prevention Magazine. Did you see it? I briefly saw it as a headline on the cover, and decided that I would not read that article. After all, I love salt. It is my only seasoning because of my genetic health problem. Remember, I'm an old person, and back when I was a baby, there were not any options for a no-fat diet. My mom taught me to just "do without" flavorings - which has served me well, I thought. But the other night, I was making divinity to feed my sugar addiction, and since I usually have something to read during the 7 minutes I'm cooking over the double boiler... and because I read all articles consecutively when I open a magazine (OCD, I know), well, you know it was bound to happen because I quickly came to page 18, the Salt piece!

TRUE OR FALSE
Salt (a) is addictive (b) will make you fat (c) will kill you (d) all of the above

Sadly, the correct answer is d.
But the most intriguing part of the article spoke to the addictiveness of salt.
Can you believe it?
Consuming salt triggers the release of dopamine in your body, which is the neurotransmitter associated with the brain's Pleasure Center! Wow!

There is some small hope for me. The article goes on to say that we have about 10,000 tastebuds, each one has 50 to 150 receptor cells that live for 1 to 2 weeks -- which means that if you eat a lower salt diet for a couple of weeks, you can re-train your new receptors thus making the lower salt diet more pleasure-able for you.

Let's face it. We're all going to die of something. Of course, no one wants to live and feel bad all the time either...


Best wishes on your quest to improve your life. We're all in it together, right?
Oh, here's the article link online if you want to read for yourself - or maybe you prefer the path of denial? lol

http://www.prevention.com/health/health/health-concerns/how-to-kick-the-salt-habit/article/3bd0b810e847c210VgnVCM10000030281eac____